"Phil travels a lot. He plays ball for a living." I half-smiled.
"菲尔老东奔西跑。他以打球为生。"我似笑非笑地说道。
"Have I heard of him?" he asked, smiling in response.
"我听说过他吗?"他问,回了我一个微笑。
"Probably not. He doesn't play well. Strictly minor league. He moves around a lot."
"很可能没有。他的球打得不好。严格说来还在小联盟 混。他老是在东奔西跑的。"
"And your mother sent you here so that she could travel with him." He said it as an assumption again, not a question.
"所以你母亲就要你到这里来了,这样她就可以跟着到处跑了。"他又在主观臆断,而不是在问。
My chin raised a fraction. "No, she did not send me here. I sent myself."
我稍稍仰起头:"不,不是她要我来这里的,是我自己要来的。"
His eyebrows knit together. "I don't understand," he admitted, and he seemed unnecessarily frustrated by that fact.
他的两簇眉毛挤到了一起。"我不明白。"他承认道,而且他似乎对这个事实感到很失望,其实大可不必。
I sighed. Why was I explaining this to him? He continued to stare at me with obvious curiosity.
我叹了一口气。我干吗要跟他说这些呢?他仍旧目不转睛地盯着我,眼里充满了明显的好奇。
"She stayed with me at first, but she missed him. It made her unhappy… so I decided it was time to spend some quality time with Charlie." My voice was glum by the time I finished.
我妈妈一开始一直和我一起生活,但是她也想念菲尔,这让她并不快乐……所以我决定是该跟查理好好袋一段时间,增进增进感情的时候了。"说完这句话的时候,我的声音已经有点儿凄凉了。
"But now you're unhappy," he pointed out.
"可现在你不快乐,"他指出。
"And?" I challenged.
"然后呢?"我向他事事都擅自做判断提出挑战。
"That doesn't seem fair." He shrugged, but his eyes were still intense.
"这似乎不公平。"他耸了耸肩,但他的眼神并没轻松下来。
I laughed without humor. "Hasn't anyone ever told you? Life isn't fair."
我哈哈一笑,一点儿都不幽默:"难道没人告诉过你吗?生活本来就是不公平的。"
"I believe I have heard that somewhere before," he agreed dryly.
"我相信以前是在什么地方听说过。"他干巴巴地说道。
"So that's all," I insisted, wondering why he was still staring at me that way.
"这不就结了嘛。"我坚持道,心里纳闷他干吗还是那样盯着我。
His gaze became appraising. "You put on a good show," he said slowly. "But I'd be willing to bet that you're suffering more than you let anyone see."
他的凝视变成了评判的眼神。"你的戏演得还真不错呢,"他一字一顿地说,"但是我倒很愿意打个赌,赌你内心的痛苦比你流露出来的要多。"
I grimaced at him, resisting the impulse to stick out my tongue like a five-year-old, and looked away.
我冲他做了个鬼脸,忍住了像5岁的小孩那样吐舌头的冲动,把脸扭向了一边。
"Am I wrong?"
"我说错了吗?"
I tried to ignore him.
我努力不去理他。
"I didn't think so," he murmured smugly.
"我可不这么认为哟,"他自鸣得意地说。
"Why does it matter to you?" I asked, irritated. I kept my eyes away, watching the teacher make his rounds.
"这关你什么事呢?"我生气地问道。我眼睛仍然望在一边,看着老师巡回检查。
"That's a very good question," he muttered, so quietly that I wondered if he was talking to himself. However, after a few seconds of silence, I decided that was the only answer I was going to get.
"这个问题问得非常好,"他低声说道,声音小得我还以为他是在跟自己说话呢。不过,沉默了几秒钟之后,我确定那是我会得到的惟一答案了。
I sighed, scowling at the blackboard.
我叹了一口气,生气地瞪着黑板。
"Am I annoying you?" he asked. He sounded amused.
"是不是我惹你生气了?"他问。他听上去很开心。
I glanced at him without thinking… and told the truth again. "Not exactly. I'm more annoyed at myself. My face is so easy to read — my mother always calls me her open book." I frowned.
我想都没想,就瞥了他一眼……并且又一次告诉了他实话:"不全是你惹的。我更生我自己的气。我这张脸太不争气了,太容易看透了——我母亲总说我是她打开的书。"我皱起了眉头。
"On the contrary, I find you very difficult to read." Despite everything that I'd said and he'd guessed, he sounded like he meant it.
"恰恰相反,我发现你这本书太难读懂了。"尽管我什么都说了,他也什么都猜对了,但听他的口气,好像说的是真心话。
"You must be a good reader then," I replied.
"那么,你肯定是个很会看书的人,"我回答说。
"Usually." He smiled widely, flashing a set of perfect, ultrawhite teeth.
"八九不离十吧。"他咧嘴一笑,露出了一口完美无缺、超白的牙齿。
Mr. Banner called the class to order then, and I turned with relief to listen. I was in disbelief that I'd just explained my dreary life to this bizarre, beautiful boy who may or may not despise me. He'd seemed engrossed in our conversation, but now I could see, from the corner of my eye, that he was leaning away from me again, his hands gripping the edge of the table with unmistakable tension.
班纳先生这时让全班同学安静下来了,我舒了一口气,转过头来听讲。我简直不相信自己刚才把我枯燥无味的生活说给这个举止奇异、漂亮的男孩子听了,他可能会看不起我,也可能不会。我们聊天时他似乎全神贯注,可此刻,通过眼角的余光,我可以看见他又歪向一边去了,他的双手抓着桌子的边缘,显而易见,紧张得不行。
I tried to appear attentive as Mr. Banner illustrated, with transparencies on the overhead projector, what I had seen without difficulty through the microscope. But my thoughts were unmanageable.
班纳先生用投影仪上的透明幻灯片讲解时,我努力摆出一副专心听讲的样子,虽然讲解的都是那些我用显微镜不费吹灰之力看到过的东西。可我的思绪却硬是不听使唤。