I hold myself the grand reformer of the age.
我自认是这一时代了不起的改革家。
From my spout, and such spouts as mine, must flow the stream that shall cleanse our earth of a vast portion of its crime and anguish,
从我的喷嘴或姑且算作的喷嘴里流出，势必涤荡这个世界上大多罪恶与痛苦。
which have gushed from the fiery fountains of the still.
一股股清澈水流汹涌喷泻，源源不断地来自静寂的泉眼深处
In this mighty enterprise, the cow shall be my great confederate. Milk and water!
在这一辉煌的事业中，奶牛正是我伟大的同盟军，给力！牛奶，还有水！
Ahem! Dry work this speechifying, especially to all unpracticed orators.
唉! 尤其对那些初出茅庐的演说者，口干舌燥、滔滔不绝的演说，难免不是高谈阔论。
I never conceived till now what toil the temperance lecturers undergo for my sake.
直到现在我才意识到，由于我的缘故，那些演说家的节制颇为痛苦。
Do, some kind Christian, pump a stroke or two, just to wet my whistle.
那位好心的基督徒，压住水泵猛地揿按一两下，不过才弄湿我的鼻子。
Thank you, sir. But to proceed.
谢谢你，先生，请继续压呀，别松手。
The Town Pump and the Cow!
小镇水泵和奶牛不愧光荣的联手，
Such is the glorious partnership that shall finally monopolize the whole business of quenching thirst.
上帝保佑的终极完美，最终势必占据试图消除干渴的世界垄断领域！
Blessed consummation!
这一上帝佑福的终极完美！
Then Poverty shall pass away from the land, finding no hovel so wretched where her squalid form may shelter itself.
整个世界上，贫穷将不复存在。不会有遮蔽自身污秽的悲惨鄙陋。
Then Disease, for lack of other victims, shall gnaw his own heart and die.
因此，受害者从此锐减，疾病不再猖獗蔓延
Then Sin, if she do not die, shall lose half her strength.
至于罪恶，如果不能完全泯灭，亦会苟存不多。
